March 02, 2006
Am I evil? Well not entirely
So I'm joining in with a Meme that Paul created, it's basically a "what would you do if..." and pretty much deals with etiquette and your conscious. I edited some of the colour words just because I'm a wuss.
1. You’re f#$%ing with your iPod and slam your car into some other poor bastard’s in the parking lot of the liquor store. No one sees you and the owner of the other car is nowhere in sight. What do you do?Depends, if it's a little tiny mark I'm outta there, but if I did anything noticeable I'd leave a contact note.
a. Leave a note with your contact info
b. Leave a note with your bosses contact info
c. F#$%ing flee
2. You’re a guest in someone’s home for a dinner party. You excuse yourself to the restroom during dinner and have an episode of explosive diarrhea. Before you leave the bathroom you:I don't believe in that flowery stuff, I think it actually attaches itself to the stench molecules and creates a flowery stink that stays around much longer than your fecal odor
a. Spray that can of flowery stuff that doesn’t fool anyone
b. Just leave the room smelling like a chemical fire
3. You’re sitting at a traffic light thinking about your sad, mundane life. You witness a minor traffic accident where no one is injured but plenty of damage is sustained to both vehicles. You clearly saw who was at fault. When the light turns green, you:This depends on how late I am for work, and how many other people seem to be stopping and helping. If I'm late and no-one is stopping I would, but if there was even one person pulling over... vamoose!
a. Pull over to give a statement when the cops come
b. Report the accident on your cell phone
c. Just drive the f$%# away
4. You and several friends stop to pick up another friend on the way to a party. Your friend comes out wearing something that makes them look ridiculous, like a transvestite or you can clearly see a naughty bit sticking out somewhere. Do you:I would probably enjoy the humor/partial nudity for a bit and then tell them fairly soon, if there was an opening in conversation
a. Tell them right away, even though they may be embarrassed
b. Wait to see if someone else says something
c. Point it out to everyone at the party
5. You’re sitting in the conference room awaiting the start of a meeting. Six people are in attendance. Just as the handouts are coming around you hear audible flatulence, loud enough to be heard by everyone and certainly unmistakable. Do you:I would probably make a joke, get looked at like I'm a complete ass, and reinforce my status as goofy putz in the company.
a. Lower your eyes and say nothing
b. Laugh or make a joke
c. Say, “Who the f$#% was that?â€
6. You are on your way to the store. Your wife/husband/other asks you to get them something. Due to your own inability to either listen or think about anyone but yourself, you forget. When you come home, you:This happens at least once a week and I usually say I forgot, because truthfully enough ... I do!
a. Tell them you forgot
b. Lie and tell them you couldn’t find it/any
6.5 When they ask you, “Did you ask someone who works there?†You:She also asks this regularly and for some reason I never DO think of that... Posted by Oorgo at March 2, 2006 02:35 PM Permalink - Category: Funnies | TrackBack
a. Say, “No, I never thought of that.â€
b. Lie and say, “Yeah, they said they were all out.â€
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